Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Expectations and Disappointment

I've dealt with this before. I've processed this before. I've already had that "little talk" with myself in my head many times before. But, the disconnect between my expectations for the world around me and what actually happens in it is still something that is hard to accept. I should know it's coming. It's all happened before, but I still find myself surprised and disappointed.

Why can't the people around me see my point of view? The path I've laid out for them in my head is not only ideal for me, but it's ideal for them! Why would they choose something different? I've thought it through. I've considered all the angles. I've weighed the pros and cons. I'm good at that stuff. I even outlined all my findings for you and shared with you this masterful, fail-proof plan. It had it all: the risk vs. benefit analysis, the return on investment, the "what could happen if you didn't follow this course of action" summary. Why, then, would you choose to go a different direction? It makes no sense to me.

All right. I'm okay now. I'm still disappointed, but I'm okay now. Yes, I do remember the countless times when I thought I had all the answers, but found out later that I didn't. Yes, I remember the plans I made that seemed perfect at the time, but were quite flawed because by assumptions were incorrect. Yes, I know that only God has omniscience. Yes, I know that sometimes even though all the "facts" point toward following one course of action, but my gut says the opposite, that my gut could still be right. Yes, I know that many times I haven't got what I wanted and have been so happy about it later even though I felt devastated when the refusal was given. I know all this. I even know that remembering all this will likely not be my initial response the next time my plans appear to be thwarted.

Will you try to remember this too, the next time you give me your version of "not-to-be-ignored" advice? If remembering this isn't your initial response either, I'll understand. How could I not? But, I hope you get there eventually. I will for you.

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